The “Do’s” and “Don’ts” of First Dates

For those of you who like specific guidelines, here’s a list that by no means is exhaustive of some “Do’s” and “Don’ts” that will help you have a successful first date.

Do’s:

• DO be real and authentic.
• DO be interested in him.
• DO be respectful and open minded.
• DO set your expectations and boundaries before the date.
• DO pay attention to how you’re feeling about this person: 
• Is he considerate? chivalrous? 
• Does he hog the conversation and talks only about himself? 
• How does he treat the waitress or staff?
• How does he talk about friends or family?

Don’ts

• DON’T give too much personal information such as your full name.  For more tips about this new norm and some interesting stories, go to this Wall Street Journal article.
• DON’T monopolize the conversation.
• DON’T talk about past relationships, marriage, or your children.
• DON’T drink too much.
• DON’T go all the way on the first date: Sorry, doing so will not set the right tone for your relationship!  Most dating experts advise to abstaining from sexual intimacy on the first date because it often creates an unflattering perception of you as girlfriend material.  Men who are truly looking for a long-term relationship might see this behavior as “she’s too easy” and not “relationship material”.  Plus, having sex on the first date may complicate a relationship by giving a false sense of intimacy.  As one article noted, “Intimacy starts with what happens between you when you are not in the bed.”  Of course, having sex on the first date does not doom a relationship.  There have been, and will be successful relationships that has started with a “bang”!

There you have it…it may seem like a lot of rules but really what it boils down to is be courteous, respectful, and avoid any boorish behaviors.

**** Cocktail Chatterers, do you have any tips you’d like to share?  Let us know by commenting below.****